Pre-Departure Conversations: Coping with Homesickness
“When you feel homesick, just look up. Because the moon is the same wherever you go.” – Donna Tart, The Goldfinch
If you love to travel, you’ve probably been there: Lying in an unfamiliar bed at night, your mind starts to spin. You think about how far from home you are, how you’re missing your friend’s birthday party, how you just want to eat your favorite food, how you miss the smell of your dad’s freshly baked bread wafting into the living room, or the sound of your mom’s voice…So you call home and feel comforted temporarily, but when the call finishes, the sadness and loneliness intensify. Social media just stokes the FOMO even more.
Homesickness is a reality of travel for many people.
While it’s more common on longer term study abroad programs that stretch beyond the initial period of excitement and novelty, it’s a possibility that your students will experience homesickness no matter length of their program.
So, it’s a worthwhile topic for pre-departure conversation.
Factors that influence the likelihood of homesickness
Whether homesickness strikes or not can be influenced by several factors:
Previous travel experience. Students traveling abroad for the first time may be more likely to experience homesickness.
Personality & coping skills. Students who have strong attachments to home and routine or have not learned how to cope well when away from their normal environment are likely to struggle more.
Level of cultural difference. The more intense the contrast in cultures between home and your host location, the more likely homesickness will strike. This can include differences in food, languages, culture, lifestyle, etc.
Support system & friendships. When students travel with peers they know and adults they already trust, they are likely to have fewer encounters with homesickness.
Program structure & activities. When students have too much free time, they have time to dwell on missing home and scroll on social media. A busy itinerary helps keep them distracted and in the present.
Personal circumstances. If a student misses a significant life event like a wedding or birthday, or if they are already going through personal challenges before travel, this could trigger homesickness.
Phone time. While some communication with family is healthy, important, and recommended, students who spend too much time talking to people back home and scrolling on social media are constantly dragged away from the positive experience they could be having in the present.
Supporting Students Through Homesickness: Pre-departure Conversations
When students are aware that homesickness is a possibility while traveling, they’re more likely to recognize it for what it is and reach out for help.
Before you go:
Normalize homesickness. Talk about what it feels like, how normal and how common it is, and why it happens.
Ask students to reflect. As part of the pre-departure conversation, ask students to do a short reflective exercise. Have them jot down what “home” means to them. This can help them anticipate what their triggers will be.
Start with “why”. Ask students to journal on why this trip is important to them, what they expect to gain from it, and why they are excited about it. Encourage them to reach back to their “why” when they feel homesick.
Create a support plan. Be sure students know that they can approach you with concerns. Work out what coping strategies each student will use to support their own mental health abroad (exercise, journaling, etc.)
Communication. Set out a plan with your students for how often they will stay in touch with home, and when, reminding them that communicating excessively can make homesickness worse, as can spending too much time on social media.
Parents. Depending on the age of your group, you can also speak to parents. Make sure they are aware that their (albeit well-meaning) communication with their students should be kept positive and not too excessive while they are abroad.
Equip students with coping methods. Share the tips below with your students.
10 Tips for Coping with Homesickness While Abroad
Share the 10 tips below on how to cope with homesickness while abroad with your students:
Be present. Practice mindfulness and keep your thoughts on the present moment. Engage with each activity, take an interest in your surroundings, and remember to bring your mind back when it starts to wander. Focusing on your breath, or even footsteps if you’re walking, can help.
Reflect. Writing is a great way to process emotions and new experiences. Keeping a journal or blog can help you record your thoughts and work out why you are feeling so homesick.
Friendships. Stick together with your group—physically, but also by sharing experiences, opening up to one another, and finding peer support. This can be a great source of comfort in an unfamiliar setting.
Remember your “why”. If you’re feeling homesick, remember why you decided to take this trip in the first place, what you hope to gain from it, and why you were excited about it. You might also remember that it is temporary and an incredible opportunity to grasp while you can.
Self-care. Take time to exercise, enjoy some fresh air, sleep well, drink enough water, make healthy food choices, and stay in tune with your mind and body.
Positivity. Make a conscious effort to find the positives in your new environment. (eg. You didn’t like that meal so much because it wasn’t what you were used to, but the waitress was lovely, you experienced new flavors and learned about local cuisine, and you had a great time chatting with the group.)
Gratitude. A lot of research has been published on the power of gratitude. Try keeping a gratitude journal daily. Keeping the saying “have an attitude of gratitude” in mind can go a long way in fostering happiness.
Focus on what you can control. When we travel, there are a lot of things that aren’t within our control. Instead, turn your attention to what is: Your mindset, preparation, choices related to self-care, spending, communication, cultural sensitivity, flexibility, openness, and adaptability, for example.
Be connected, with boundaries. Speaking to your family and friends regularly is important, but keep healthy boundaries around timing and topics of conversation so these communications don’t trigger feelings of homesickness.
Reach out. Your faculty leader and EdOdyssey guide are there for you if you’re not coping well with feelings of homesickness. They have likely experienced this themselves, so don’t hesitate to reach out for extra support.
Supporting Homesick Students During Travel
While you won’t always be able to prevent homesickness from occurring altogether, as a faculty leader, you can play a supportive role for your students.
Here are a few things to keep in mind on the road:
Environment. Create a supportive and inclusive atmosphere within your group so no one feels isolated or unable to reach out if they need to.
Activities. Keep students busy and engaged with their activities. Be sure to include some time outdoors and time for movement.
Communicate. Plan to have regular check-ins with each student individually. This might be just a few minutes every few days, even within a casual chat, as long as it’s in a space where they would feel comfortable bringing up concerns.
Reflect. Create a channel for reflection. Use a group blog or encourage students to journal individually. On top of this, carve out space for open group conversations where reflection is the main goal.
Have a plan. Though it is unlikely, have a plan ready in advance to engage with next-level professional support if there is a student who is seriously struggling with homesickness and their mental health generally.
A POSITIVE ANGLE ON HOMESICKNESS
Rather than a sign of weakness, homesickness offers us perspective on where we come from and who we are. For many of us, home is the foundation of our identity. It can remind us of our values, the comforts that have shaped us, and the things we appreciate in our daily lives. Through this lens, we can view new experiences as building blocks that sit on a solid support system. We can reframe homesickness as something to be grateful for because it means we have something or someone wonderful to return to when our temporary adventures come to an end. Studying abroad brings growth, increased confidence, and a broader understanding of the world. Homesickness is simply a temporary bridge, connecting what we already know truly matters with all that we are to gain from the journey unfolding in front of us.
Read more about mental health abroad in our blog post titled “Leading a Custom Program Amid Among Gen Z’s Mental Health Epidemic.”